I've thought alot about what I wanted to say in this post. you know, the "last blog before surgery" post. i thought it would be a lot of reflecting on the last 4 months and how much pain ive been in. how i've taken camp on the pity pot with several attempts to get off with no luck. i think ive done enough of that though.
it's been 129 days today since my initial injury in january. a simple thing i had done countless times finally got the best of me.
74 days since my last run (really? only 74? apparently 74 days feels like a lifetime!). clearly i tried to power through my injury and thought that it would go away. for awhile my back felt better when i ran and then just like that, one day i couldn't run anymore.
ive spent enough time feeling sorry for myself, being jealous of everyone else who could run, and crying. im over it and im tired of it and ive let it impact my life in more ways then i care for.
all this time away from life has given me a lot of time to think. everyone has said "maybe this happened for a reason". ugh really? not what i wanted to hear thank you. buuuuuut i think they were right. 3 weeks ago i got hungry. hungry to be a better runner. to be faster & stronger. i've had lots of time to read and i've figured out that my "ill run when i can find time and maybe do some x-training and core work if i feel like it" attitude is not going to help me reach my goals.
i'm blessed that running has not been taken away from me for good and im going to take full advantage of that when i return. many of you have told me you are thinking and praying for me. it means so much to me to know that there are so many people out there rooting for me. here's what i want you to do for me though. i want you to go out for a run today or tomorrow, naked. no watch, no tunes, no expected pace, no pre determined distance. just go out and run because you can! enjoy the world around you. celebrate the fact that today you can run! theeeen, tell me about how awesome it was!
with that, i am going to enjoy today. ill grab a few beers and some french fries at my favorite bar with one of my best friends and simply relax. thank you all who have been there for me. i think i am finally at the end of this long road.