Friday, July 15, 2011

patience? i haz none

....true story. i might be the most inpatient person ever. not like, oh hey it's taken you 45 minutes to bring me my cheeseburger and fries you suck, inpatient. more like, i've been killing myself at the gym for a whole week, why am i not buff and have abs of steal by now, inpatient.

this whole injury thing has tested my patience a time or two. i hate sitting around and waiting for things to all these doctors appointments. i can't tell you how many times i was referred to an office and then told it would be 3-4 weeks before i could get in.

excuse me, i dont have 3-4 weeks. i have a marathon to start training for. i need to get fixed now!

clearly my urgency wasn't enough for them to fit me in any earlier. sigh. as it got later and later in the spring i slowly realized that my fall marathon was out the window (good news: i can write about it and not cry anymore! progress my friends!).

having 6 weeks off in the summer and being told to "wake up, take your meds, eat breakfast, go for a walk, take a nap, take your meds, eat lunch, go for a walk, take a nap, take your meds, eat dinner, go for a walk and then go to bed" sounds pretty sweet and im sure many people would be jealous of such a thing. i enjoyed it for a while but after a week, i was bored, restless and itching to get back to life.

anyone that knows me, knows that i don't slow down for much. i had a lot of time to think which i always have told my patients is not a good idea. too much thinking is never good. i had minor freak out moments where i felt like i would never get better and days when i felt so good i wanted to put my running shoes on and take off. i talked to two different running friends that i have a lot of respect for and they both told me i need to be patient.

but you knooooooow im not patient

you'll get back and you'll be fine. but you must be patient. if you're not, that's how you'll injure yourself. just know the more patient you are now, the better it will be later.

ok. fine. 

so here i sit. trying to be patient, a week left to go in my recovery and feeling pretty good. i take my daily 3ish mile walk once or twice a day and then rest. i spend way too much time on twitter (im sure the twitterverse will be happy when i return to work) and watching tv. i read trashy books and think about what it will be like to get back to life again. im so thankful i have the unlimited texting plan (is 8,000 a month too much?) and have designed my next tattoo. i've also refocused myself. i know what i want and im so excited to go get it. like jumping out of my skin excited!

i know that im going to need to carry all this patience over into my training. before i got injured, 26.2 was going to be a challenge. running doesn't come easy or naturally to me. it's something i have to put a lot of work into. now that i have to start from scratch, its going to be even more of a challenge. im going to need patience, trust, and strength to get through it...all things ive needed and had to get through the last 5 months. i know ive got 'em....just need to put them to use!

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